Influence–has it changed your decision

August 28, 2013

Our journey with cancer is often crowded.  Family and friends rally around, and support and well-wishing flood in; we are not alone.  We are wrapped in a cocoon of love and caring feelings. Our world suddenly changes, our lives take on a new direction and future plans are often put on hold.  Doctor appointments, tests, and treatments become part of our everyday events like it was normal to place these things in our lives and give them such importance.

We are expected to eat and breathe the ‘cancer’ topic every day; expected, too, to allow it full control of our thoughts and plans in our lives.  Who gave cancer such control?  Who said all these tests, all this chemo [chemotherapy] and radiation, all these doctor visits and drugs they prescribe; who said they were all normal and right? Did anyone say otherwise? 

Decisions need to be decided by you; otherwise, are you really making any decisions at all? At your doctor's visit information is handed to you; your diagnosis and your test results are all given to you.  Your doctor [oncologist ] without thought, explains exactly what will be done, when, and where; you are not involved except for the occasional, ‘do you understand’ or ‘ the nurse will give you all the paperwork to sign, we will see you on …….’  He stands, you stand, you're out the door to the desk, paperwork ready, signed, and your fate is sealed.  Where was your input?  Maybe a loved one joined you; they patted you on the shoulder with a carrying touch, ‘it will be okay, we are going to fight this together.’  The question is, who made the decision? Ultimately, you sign the paperwork, you approve it; you made the decision.  But why?

Your decision likely is made not because you had all the information and options before you; studied and researched your options and got second opinions; but, because someone you thought had a greater mind told you. But who told they had a great mind, that they knew everything about you and your cancer?  No one. Your mind through society’s predetermined evaluation on professionals told you. Doctors you assume have all the answers, they know everything about cancer, certainly more than you; and they act with you in mind. 

Truth is we want to believe our doctors know everything, and they act in our own best interest but they don’t. Many are so busy they forget your whole case, especially the small things that make your case different; you are categorized and dealt with usually in a very business-like manner.  If you dare ask a question out of the ordinary, question an option, or introduce any alternative options; that carrying manner will quickly change, and you will receive indignant, often rude, condescending answers. Scare tactics are used to keep patients that dare to question options or introduce alternative options in control.

Facing cancer is difficult but making decisions that are yours alone is more difficult; but, it could just be the biggest life-deciding decision you will ever make.  No decision is the wrong one if it is yours; no decision is final, as conditions change so too you will change decisions, but it has to be yours.  It is your life.  Decision-making has become one of influenced advice; your feelings and your choice are often discounted. Who knows better about you, than you?  

If you are facing making this important decision, don’t make the mistake of allowing outside influence to make your decision.  Many have allowed this and their influenced decision was dead wrong.  Your life should be in your hands. It is too late for those I know but not too late for others ready to make that decision or change their decision; be sure what you decide is based on what YOU want, not what your doctor says or a loved one advises. Your mind decides based on everything that influences it; the spirit is not influenced, it knows only what the universe supplies to it. God speaks before the mind thinks…… it is my humble motto and good to live by.

Jesicha’s Hope supports and advocates for decisions to be made solely on the spirit; a mindful decision provides a decision based on influential data.  Although we support a chemical-free journey, and ‘do no harm’ treatments; chemotherapy and radiation are your decision if that is what you feel is right. Our support and resources are offered in order to provide data for your own decision-making.  Visit us and read a story where influential data and pressure of outside advice created a saga of despair but ultimately hope prevailed, only too late for the outcome dreamed. Jesicha’s story hopefully will give hope and strength to others; influence as she says is the greatest wrong you can do to another. 

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